During my Natural Science class tonight, I couldn't help but be bored out of my mind. However, when I heard the word "stars," I paused my thoughts of what I was having for dinner, and listened...
As the professor talked about atoms and how they're reused and never reproduced, he mentioned something about the stars. He explained how our ancient stars explode sometimes and that's how our atoms were created. How cool is it to think, that the atoms in my hair, could be the same that rested on Cleopatra's crown--or the same atoms that make up my little red Neon, could be the same of an Indian's canoe. But, the most interesting conclusion, is that these lovely stars that I adore, make up the people I love, and hate, and miss, and kiss, and pass by on the freeway.
This is my ode to the majestic stars; but lets face it, no words on Earth could describe the phenomenon.
My favorite place on Earth, has to be your arms
But my favorite sight to see, has got to be the stars.
To think, that all this time ago, some great being thought of you
And knew, that this all would mean, I would fall in love, too.
With a burst, a flame, a shift and tug
Some stars began to fade; they flew and ran and became my mouth--
Giving me ability to speak your name.
They're a brilliance I can't stop thanking, a divinity I can't deny.
For, the same stars I see, were the same Amelia saw shine.
Oh these lights that once guided Mary home,
Also have guided me.
And the few of which have died since then,
Landed deep, between our warm, sweet sheets.
Knowing that these stars hold secrets, no scientist will ever know;
I've come to wonder how it is, my hand can't seem to let yours go.
And when I start to explain why it's okay for me to think,
These stars sing each other back to sleep
I've got to remind myself the way,
Your heart beat sings "sweet dreams."
Monday, March 16, 2015
Wednesday, March 4, 2015
Ready, OK!
Yesterday was my last day as a cheer leading coach, and let me tell you, it was not the cheeriness that got me through the long month.
These girls were nothing but trouble: loud, rude, prideful, and mean. Looking back to my first day, I remember walking into the school thinking "this is will the world's funnest job." I would be coaching some twelve year olds, be a positive role model, and we can all talk about nail polish and boys and do homework together!
Turns out, I was the rebound coach--the coach who stepped in for their beloved ex-coach who *cough cough* yes, bailed. They hated me, they hated my rules, my cheers, my tactics, my ideas, my plans... the list continues to this day.
From being called a bitch, to mocked, to being ignored, and sometimes even yelled at-- I've had it all.
I kept fighting with myself, quit-don't quit-quit-don't quit. Welp, I stuck with it.
Now, today, the first day of something different I'll be teaching or tutoring, I can't help but hope they're all in my new class... Yes, even the girls who called me names and make me want to pull my hair out.
I want to see their wild eyes and dirty faces in my seats, eager to make fun of whatever weird lesson plan I have ready for the day. I want to hear their loud, loud voices yelling or "talking" in my class. I want to hear their excuses and demands. I want the four quiet ones and the ten crazies.
Today, when I walk into the boundaries of the school, there are a few things I'm already going to know, along with a lot more I'm going to have to learn.
I'm going to know that those fourteen girls are rough, not because of their language or clothing, but because they've been through it all--bad and good, but mostly bad. I'm going to know that those girls were mean, not because of hatred towards me, but fear. Who was I, to walk into their school and assume I was what these girls needed to succeed? And finally, I'm going to know that these girls are a family. Even though the love might not be bright and shining, it sure does flow through each of them and out to the other.
And yesterday, when I hugged them each goodbye and handed out awards, I knew that this team of mine didn't need me, I needed them.
And next time one of them gets on my last nerve, I'm going to have to come back and re-read this.
These girls were nothing but trouble: loud, rude, prideful, and mean. Looking back to my first day, I remember walking into the school thinking "this is will the world's funnest job." I would be coaching some twelve year olds, be a positive role model, and we can all talk about nail polish and boys and do homework together!
Turns out, I was the rebound coach--the coach who stepped in for their beloved ex-coach who *cough cough* yes, bailed. They hated me, they hated my rules, my cheers, my tactics, my ideas, my plans... the list continues to this day.
From being called a bitch, to mocked, to being ignored, and sometimes even yelled at-- I've had it all.
I kept fighting with myself, quit-don't quit-quit-don't quit. Welp, I stuck with it.
Now, today, the first day of something different I'll be teaching or tutoring, I can't help but hope they're all in my new class... Yes, even the girls who called me names and make me want to pull my hair out.
I want to see their wild eyes and dirty faces in my seats, eager to make fun of whatever weird lesson plan I have ready for the day. I want to hear their loud, loud voices yelling or "talking" in my class. I want to hear their excuses and demands. I want the four quiet ones and the ten crazies.
Today, when I walk into the boundaries of the school, there are a few things I'm already going to know, along with a lot more I'm going to have to learn.
I'm going to know that those fourteen girls are rough, not because of their language or clothing, but because they've been through it all--bad and good, but mostly bad. I'm going to know that those girls were mean, not because of hatred towards me, but fear. Who was I, to walk into their school and assume I was what these girls needed to succeed? And finally, I'm going to know that these girls are a family. Even though the love might not be bright and shining, it sure does flow through each of them and out to the other.
And yesterday, when I hugged them each goodbye and handed out awards, I knew that this team of mine didn't need me, I needed them.
And next time one of them gets on my last nerve, I'm going to have to come back and re-read this.
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